Change is a process.
I suppose sometimes change happens, and we react, adjust, roll with it.
But internal change is a process. It takes time and proceeds in stages, by fits & starts. The first is becoming aware of a need and/or desire for change. Identify the problem. It required introspection & honesty, which can be very difficult.
What I find more painful is the next stage. I know what I’m doing “wrong”. I can see myself doing it, returning to an old habit that I’ve found damaging or isolating. But all I can do is watch. I don’t know how to stop it.
I have hope I will learn. And in the meantime, I will try to be lenient with myself. It takes time to replace old habits built & reinforced over years, to learn new ways.
Change is a process. I’ll will find my way through it. But it will take time.