As you read posts scattered around all corners of the internet, it seems inevitable that this time of year brings time in reflection. And here I find myself putting words of similar nature to a (web)page, though much has been kicking around in my head for a while.
Posting to this blog has been… sporadic (at best) for a few years now. There are reasons (there always are, and sometimes quite good ones). I admire folks like Doctor Zen who have maintained consistency over the years. My best intentions are never quite realized. I’m a slow writer, and there are so many things that draw time and attention.
I sometimes consider: Why do I keep the blog around? Why did I blog in the first place?
Those who’ve been around a while and gained a following in some circles over time often say (and I have to): You’ve got to do it for you! You blog first and foremost because you want to do it. You want to write. You want to process ideas. You want to clarify and crystallize the workings in your own mind. It doesn’t matter if no one reads it.
Except… it does, to some extent, doesn’t it? Blogs are in public spaces for others to read. Otherwise we’d write some things in a private journal and be done with it. We share on the world wide web, whether through blogs or other platforms, in part to connect with other people. But as popularity of a platform waxes and then wanes, making those connections can become harder.
Add to that, as life moves forward, we change. Our interests shift. Our styles turn. Our positioning in both formal and informal communities changes—and the communities change too. We lose the attention of some. What we have to say resonates with others. We maybe are looking for a different way to connect—a different level of formality or openness or depth or speed or familiarity.
I’ve been reflecting on these things a while. But I still haven’t reached any firm conclusions. I’m not quite ready to let go of the blog. I’m not quite ready to commit to a new venture. In part, 2018 brought big changes—a cross-country, a new job, co-habitation with my partner, new running goals*. It takes time for the turbulence to settle, for the new routine to feel routine.
So I’ll bide my time, continue to reflect, maybe dabble with some ideas. And we’ll see what 2019 brings.